sprain my back ... manage to get mc ... excuse from PE for one week ... hehe ...

saw the news ... steff was rob ...

sometimes if we wan to take everything into acc then we wont be happi to stay happi ...

ok ...
i hate him ...
happi ...
stop making fun out of it ...
u guys juz like it izznt it ...
dun even wanna try n use all yur stupid brain to think ...
is it so funni ...
we are friends ...
why make things goes this way ...
all the bloody idiots ...
i dun haf to entertain u all ...

i juz wanna get out ..

u said enough ...
juz b'cos i didnt say anything ...
n keep quiet ...
does mean i agree ...
doesnt mean i admit ...
i need my own time ...
i got my own things to do ...

why cant u guys juz keep yur big fat mouth shut ...
*irritating*
for once i am pissed off ...
everywhere every place there is someone or many pple wif big irritating mouth ...

for goodness sake juz leave me alone ...
juz let me have my time ...
n let me do wad i wan ...
i dun enjoy to be in anywhere ...

there is juz no place for me in the world ...

families are still the best ...

crapz ... i dun think u understand who i am toking abt ... nvm i know can le ...
juz dun wanna hurt anyone thats all ...
juz appreciate if u stop taking us as a joke ...

sld i stay wif such pple ...

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
8:45 PM

(0 comments) ♥



wo niu dao le yao ...
gen ben pao bu dong ...

ni bu yao ba shuo you zhe ren dou tui dao wo zai gan ma jia can dian shi ...ta cao shi bing bu shi wo ...ni bu xiang xin wo shuo de hua jiu suan le ...ni bu yao zai na bian yi zhi ahuo ...ta du shu ... wo ye zai du ...ta du wan le wo hai zai du ...mei cuo wo shi can le hen duo tian shi jie mu ...dan shi wo ye du de bi ping cang duo ..ying gai shi be jia li duo ...zai jia li ... mei chi xiang dao du wan le hai shi du shu shi zui hui bu you zhi zhu de man man zuo ...zai na li jiu bu yi yang ...zuo wan le wo zhi dao wo ke yi fang song ... xiu xi ... suo yi wo hui nu li de du ... du wan le jiu xiu xi ... zuo de duo ... shi jian yong de ye shao ...shui ran you chu men ... ke shi ni ming bu ming bai ... zhe gen ben bu hui ying xiang dao wo ...bu yao yi zhi yong qi hua shuo wo yi zhi zuo zhu can, shuo yi niu dao yao ... hai shi zhe ge na ge de ... wo bu xi huan ... zai wo xin li gan ma de chun zai he di wei bi ni zong yao ... ying wei ta bi ni gen liao jie wo ...cong xiao dao da ni chong lai mai you shi guo cong wo de jiao du ju xiang dong xi ...ni yong yuan jue de ni shi dui de ... ni yao she me jiu she me ... ru guo mei you shun zhe ni de yi, ni zhi hui da han da jiao ...ni ming bu ming bai ... ni ben shen de cun zai jiu shi wo bu yao zai jia de yuan ying ...ni hui yi zhi lao dao zhe ge ... lao dao na ge ... zhe ge bu xing na ge ye bu xing ...gan ma gen ni bu yi yang ... suo yi wo xi huan qu ta de jia ... bu guan duo ma fan wo hai shi yao qu ... ying wei zai ta jia wo gan jue hen zhi zai ... wo yao zuo shen me jiu zuo shen me ... ta cong lai bu hui gao shu wo zhe ge bu xin na ge bu xin ... ying wei ta liao jie wo ming bai wo ... ta zhi dao wo yi ding hui zuo wan ... ta qing yan can dao wo zuo ... ta liao jie ... ke shi ni dou mei you shi zhe qu ming bai ... zai na li ... wo zuo de duo ye xiu xi de duo ... ben shen de ya li gen ben dou bu chun zai ...bu yao yi zhi tui xie shuo you de zhe ren ... wei shen me ta de shi mei chi dou shi wo de shi ... er wo de shi que mei you ren bang wo fen dan ne ... wo yi de ren dao di xu yao guan duo sao ren de shi ... duo shao ren de shi dou bian chen wo de shi le ne? wo mei you tao yan ni ... zhi shi wo ji shi cai neng ying wei zhi zi de shi er bu shi bie ren de er fan nao ne? wo you zhi neng xuan zhe ne?

wo tao yen na xie ba bie ren tui dao yi bian de ren ... ta men gen ben mei you zhi ge gen wo shuo hua ...

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
6:54 AM

(0 comments) ♥



when out with py, gab n zx on friday watch juz follow law it is nice ... then py acc me go fetch my sis ...

friday night when to godma hse ... it was great to be free ...

today finally finish my hmwk ... fourth aunt treat ... i wasnt in a mood to eat ... manage to watch da vinci code today ... the show is nice ...

you guys sux ...
ya i wont forget wad u all do ...
trash right ...
it is always at the crucial time that pple c ...
ya idiots ...
dun even wish to look at all yur #%$*@ face ...
juz throw aside like some dump ...

why do this to yurself ...
it wont make things better ...
ya abundant ...
so wad ...
it's not worth it ....
things wont change juz because of all this ...
they guys are not worth it ...

dun come treatening me b'cause i am study ...
i am sick n tired of this reason ...
i also dun wan it ...

she had exam ...
not me ...
then wad the bloddy hell does that got to do wif me ...
stop pushing everything to me ...

stop it ...
i had my own feelings ...
u guys are all juz idiots ...

open yur eyes n it is a busy day ahead ...
this is life ...
nth nice ...
thats why i dun look forward to everydays life ...
it looks like a routine ...

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
9:32 PM

(0 comments) ♥



tml gg to watch juz follow law ... hope she can make it ... then gg tampinese ...

today haze dad come ... the stmosphere is so weird ... juz so quite ... he came wif his wife ... his wife was like cheerful ... but she juz remind me of someone i hate to rmb ... that idoitic women ... anyway it is juz so funni that they look alike ... the baby was cute ... onli two months old ... to be honest the maid is more pretty ... ok la ... i didnt say that juz because she is his wife ... it is a fact la ... i find her ok ... juz that why muz they look so alike ... hmmmmm ... it juz spoil my mood thats all ... ya that face ... that special face that make them to be the second ...

didnt get to do the debate today ... can see that the teacher is angry ... but wad can we do ...
today lesson was bored n tiring ...

my nephew is so cute ... lolz ...

>dun do that juz because if me ... it is not worth it ...
ren yao huo de xiao sha, zhi zai ...
wo hen lei le ...
jiu ming ar ...
kuai feng le ...

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
4:46 PM

(0 comments) ♥



yesterday went out wif my cousins ... took neo-print ... n we abundane all the aunties n uncles ... lolz ... they were waiting outside the shop ... for a long time ... long queue ... (intent to upload the pic .. but it turn out to be too small)

had been having a scare lately ... dun know why ... i dun know because lack of sleep or wad ... but something had been scaring me ...

as for now i need to get my hmwk done ... gg out later ...

i wanna watch juz follow law ...

- why should love be the only reason for marraige?????

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
3:37 PM

(0 comments) ♥



today is daddy and brother birthday ... didnt buy them anything cos i totally forgot abt it ... hehe ...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DADDY AND BRO

ok the new year celebration today was boring ... some of the class hamper were quite nice ...

wish everyone a HAPPY NEW YEAR beforehand ...














VS












SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
10:18 PM

(0 comments) ♥



ok today is total defence day ... the day when JO begins ...

new year coming ... it will be a boring new year for me ...

today very suai ... went to fetch sis wif mummy ... we cycled ... on the way back when i was about to turn in in blk540 ... my bicycle crash wif another guy bicycle ... i jumped of the bic ... only got a bit of injury nth big la ... juz that due to the knock my leg abit pain ... grandma was laughing at me ... she said i always jump off bic lolz ....... long story ...

when shop n save juz now ... saw a staff there sitting down counting stuff ... her pants was so low that we can see her butt ... pai sei lolz ... grandma was kind enough to tell her that her pants is very low ... then that naughty haze say my grandma kpo ... lolz ...

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
8:20 PM

(0 comments) ♥



[poem]


-To be or not to be, that's a question-
6:43 PM

(0 comments) ♥



ok yesterday went to some JC ... ard the island hehe ... went meridian ... i like the sch ... although abit old ... but i dun like the uniform ... tampines is good also ... i like the campus n the uniform ... haha ... but the pro is i need one hr to travel to tjc and 1h15min to mjc ... cant make up my mind ... haiz ... should i stay in innova ... but i hate morning run ... i am not that sporty ... or should i go sajc ... but my cousin in it ... how ... i haven even register lo ... had been thinking a long time ... my brain are big now ... i dun know wad sch to go wad comb. to take ... i feel so stupid to be worried abt such things ... some sch i like this n dun like that ... i like tjc but very far ... my lao bu wan me to go ijc ... anyway in the end i know where i wanna end up ... our promise ... lolz ...

maybe will register tonight ... really gotta think it over ... i dun wanna end up regretting ... wadeva it is ...

never regret abt wad u decide ... u choose it n u live to it ...

yjc?? heard that last year the result was good ... it is now one of the top ten jc ... improving alot this sch ... how how how ... where i wanna go ...

anyway i forget to mention ... that day went haunted hse(sat) ... me n my frens was so bad ... we were damn not cooperative ... the 'ghost' call us do this we do that ... we r suppose to be afraid ... my fren end up snatching the ghost doll ... it was fun ... starting eas scary la ... we shouted once lolz ... the ghost story wasnt that scary ... i was concentrating at the 'ghost' i know that ghost is up to no good lolz ... i love the haunted hse ... haha ... i had been having a laugh abt it lolz ...

ijc/ mjc or tjc ???

it had been very happening ... but i got something more important in my head ... buai ...










[Face painting at i@fun ]


















[part of the neo-print taken wif miss chee, py, kx n jn]

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
5:51 PM

(0 comments) ♥



today went to cousin hse to celebrate my bro birthday ... dad birthday same day as him ... haha ... but i am broke ... when i heard that she was coming my heart sank ... but in the end onli her parent turn up ... hehe ... she called my yesterday at ten plus ... and she kept talking non-stop as if i should be celebrating wif her ... and dun sleep too ... anyway wasnt in the mood to really entertain her ... it's great that u know pple stand by u ... i know it sounds bad ... although they are dissapointed or wadeva ... they still stand by me ... n i am greatful ... cause we will gather together n had fun talking bad abt her =p ... ok la ... not really bad ... they juz ............. i know they limit kkz ... haha ... had a great time today ... although my mood wasnt that good at the mention of her name ... i juz enjoy it ...

today went JC shopping ... i am considering tampinese now ... pioneer abit ermmmm far n i got to walk a long distance into the sch ....
maybe i will end up staying in my godmother hse ... u never know ...

i know my mood very unstable nowadays n i seems to be crying very often ... i juz feel sad ... that's all ... ya will try to cheer up ... no matter wad life still goes on ...

never know it is so difficult to decide where to study lolz ...
anyway my decision change every now n then lolz ... haven really decided ... i think will register last min ... cause i dun wanna end up regretting ... will take a long time to consider first ... tml maybe continue shopping ...

i know it another two years ... another competition ... it's in our blood that we muz compete ... that is also one reason why i dun wanna go JC ... juz couldnt avoid it ... another few more years of hard work ... n i am determine to work hard ... i muz win ... even for once ... for 16 years ... all the suffering ... all the sadness ... i am gonna get it all back ... for 16 years ... i am always look as the second ... she is always better ... for once i am gonna work hard ... to win ...

i am really having a hard time deciding ... my heart feel like bursting ... i got many things in my mind nowadays ... my head is twice it's size now ...

my goal ... i will work hard towards it ... it may all seems so bad ... but u are never in my shoe ... u wont understand ... all that i have gone true ... all the pressure that is making me cant breathe ... i am determine ... no matter wad it takes ....

u r e one who wan me to go JC ... u are the one who insist ... u are the one who quarrel wif me cause i wanna go poly ... n now u are the one who set all the rules ... dun wan this n that ... i juz wanna say ... wad the HELL do u wan from me ...

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
9:49 PM

(0 comments) ♥



i know i repeat some of the stuff ... but i jzu forget wad i blog yesterday ... ya ...

ok i am home ... i cant stand all the heat ... n i really need rest ... i ditn sleep well last night ... cried for hours ... today morning my eyes was swollen ... n hearing her name today morning spoils all my mood ya ...

i know u can say me kiasu or wad .. that is me ... 16 years ... haiz ... it juz wont come true ...

no one will understand the pressure i am having ... i cried before i took my results ... can u believe it ...

i know very well ... even if my mum didnt sound dissapointed ... even if my cousins dun sound dissapointed ... even if my mum didnt say me i will still cry ...

because i lose again ... n unexpectedly ... i lose ... 10 is 10 ... 13 is 13 ... no matter how my cousin stand by me .. it is still a difference ...

i muz admit i was satisfied in the first place ... but when i heard her marks ... i started to blame nyself ... juz 3 pts ... it's juz 3 points ...

no one would understand how i feel ... that kind of environment ... that kind of atmosphere ... i ahd been living in it ... i had act ignorrant ... but i can act that i dun feel sad at all ...

i am juz sad ... very sad ... i lose until hen bu gan yuan ... hen yuan wang ... u know ... i ahd been crying ... today i wake up the first thing that happen is that my tears come out again ... it juz come out ... i cant stop it ... u r not in my shoe ... u wont know how it feel ... ya cheer up ... i wish too ...

i know everyone says 13 is good enough la ... i know it too ... but i juz couldnt stand it ... i juz cant control myself ... i will go into IMH soon ... i decided to go pioneer ... see how things goes first lo ... i dun know ... i juz dun wanna continue dissapointing anyone ... i dun one to dissapoint myself too ... n i know if we ended up in JC ... they will continue comparing ... my dad knows me ... he say i dun wanna go JC cause i dun wanna run ... n dun wanna be compared anymore ... i muz agree he is right ... although both of us took very different comb ... she took lit n comb sc all that ... they juz like to compare ... i juz need to learn to let go ...

really need to consider if i should comtinue in JC ... i dun wanna go mad ...

ok i@fun was fun ... but i juz couldnt stand it .. all the heat all that ... gonna get skin cancer under the sun so long ... i got sun-burn ... it hurts ...

i will cheer up ... will learn to let go though i know it is impossible ... jia you ba ...

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
9:41 PM

(0 comments) ♥



ok i had been crying till now since i reached home ... i dun know how to say the feeling n dun wish to elaborate on it ... i dun know how to explain n dun wish to explain ... pressurise thats also y i dun wanna come home ... is it fun comparing ... i hate it ... ya straight As so wad ... i hate it hate it ... *sob* ... juz sad la .... will be fine in awhile ...

not in the mood to blog anything ... but i got to be truthful to myself ... i am satisfied ... really satisfied it is better than i expected ...

ok cheer up ... jia you ...

i know we take different combi all that ... cannot compare .. it's juz sad la ... she is making me worst ... it's like u are being demoralize ... i dun know how to say la ... it juz dun feel good ...

juz need a rest ... su zhuang dun think too much ...

today went out wif ms chee ... shop wif her ... take neo-print wif her ... chat wif her ... really enjoy la ... ya ... will upload the neoprint went free ... haha ... all the fun ... we even see her trying clothes lo ... n we got lots of comment .. haha ...

sob,
SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
9:49 PM

(1 comments) ♥



today morning assembly when we was preparing to go back to class, the VP suddenly look at me ... then he smile at me ... i feel so uneasy ... then when i walk pass him ... he talk to me ... i was thinking did i do anything wrong ... haha ... but he juz ask me how i find the college ... lolz ... scared for nth ... dotz ... my fren was asking me why he suddenly target me ...

one more day ... i bet anything in the world that i will sure have sleepless night today ... god bless ...

tml gg back to school to do last minute touch up on the i@fun before gg back to chr ...

nervous nervous nervous ....

i had a hard time finding my t-cher today ...

i am having a severe head-ache now ...............

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
7:08 PM

(0 comments) ♥



after geo today ... i suddenly feel very fortunate ... mas show us a 'movie' on india ... anyway hope i can go there some other time ...

there is something i wanna comment about ... the hockey guys run damn fast ... n i mean very fast ... yesterday i while walking ard the track i discover that ... the timing i used to walk one round they can run three rounds ... siao de lo ... n u know the first day wad the teacher told us ... they are always jogging at such a slow rate that they can talk while jogging ... yesterday finally saw how they run lo .. ya damn slow ... the teacher watch muz had gone wrong lo ... n the guys dun seemed to be tired ... one round vs three rounds leh ... n u know it is very stupid that when u are walking around the track half way through you will feel some wind, n u realise that a group of 'yellow' guys run pass u ... n u will be so irritated that they are running as if they are not tired at all, when u are damn tired ...

2 more days ... getting more nervous as the days goes by ... my geo lecturer told us that she was so worried when she was abt to recieve her result that she was sick for three days ... haha ... at least i not as bad as her ... its a good sign ... lol ...

today stay back to do our banner ... not done yet ... but i know it will be nice ... yippy ...

yesterday watch the i not stupid thinggy ... it is nice ... try to catch it other time too ...

actually it is not so bad
i realise
w/o u
the earth will still spin .. it will not stop ...
n i wont stop because .......

crapz ...
it juz doesnt matter ...

the thinggy below is juz for someone ...
(sometimes life juz change like nobody buisness ...
everything doesnt goes the way we went ...
everything went wrong ...
the way u live change a great deal ...
your routine are all mix up ...
but this is life ...
learn to accept ...
and cheer up ..
things are not the way they are ... .
being sad/anxious wont make things better ...
live life to the fullest ...
jia you ...
cheer up kkz :) ...)

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
7:31 PM

(0 comments) ♥



4 more day before O's come out ... yap ... worried ... but dun worri i wont have sleepless night ... cuase i damn tired ... the results will be out at 2.30 ...

today cousin went into hospital (midnight) ... uncle n aunt bring him out all the way to singapore at 12 in the morning to be hospitalise ... blah blah blah ......
it juz occur to me how fragile is life ... u can juz die without a reason n all of the sudden ...
here i am worrying for such stupid thing ...
it juz makes everything so small ... so small ...

live as though there is no tml ...

of course lazy bum like me always have reasons to skip my CCA ...

saw zhang jay-walking today ... n i use my phone to take down his photo ... he was standing in the middle of the road .. hehe ... ok not funni ... i juz got nth better to do ...

damn tired ... haven touch my hmwk yet ... i got tonnes ...

haiz its onli monday ....

you sie shi bu shuo zui hui lai bu ji ...

........ really need to get things done first ...

SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
7:46 PM

(0 comments) ♥



looking at the stack of things to be done ... i feel very frastrated all of the sudden ... dun know where to start from ... n the fact is my head is cracking up ...

i feel so tired ... juz feel like i had not sleep enough ... but i already sleep till nine today le lo ... juz feel tired ba ...

worried...

i am nth to u ...




SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
1:55 PM

(0 comments) ♥



it's friday ... nthere is no school yippy ... ok i know i will be rotting at home today ... juz dun wish go out ... wanna have a very very good rest ... which is almost impossible ... cause i got a whole list of things to do today ... i wrote it all out ...

one thing that i like about not schooling is that i can sleep until very very very late .... this whole week i haven even had one good sleep ... i slepp like onli abt four hrs everday for the past few weeks ... today finally can wake up at nine ... it is an achievement ... haha ....

yesterday when to a pig hse who bath at six ... u know who ... haha ... i found the magazine she wans ... she muz be very happy lolz ...

crapz ....

no school ... it's great ... sch is tiring ... it's a fact ...

worry ... no use saying more ... gonna juz keep it in my heart ... no point ... i juz couldnt stop myself ... so wad if i am worrying now n then ... nth would change ...
juz like ...
i dun wanna change it too ...

there u are always there ...
it juz hurts ...
no point ...
haiz ...


~ greatness inspires envy, envy endangers spite, spite spawns lies.

Tired,
SZ

-To be or not to be, that's a question-
10:30 AM

(0 comments) ♥

I AM WHO I AM;

Goh Su Zhuang Alicia
born in 13/09/1990
aliciagoh_angel@hotmail.com

MUSIC; MY LIFE

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